Week four saw the harvest festival, no one warned me of the very steep hill to the church-my lungs nearly gave out, what with being overweight, carrying a heavy bag of harvest stuff and having a chest infection. I wrongly assumed it would be easier on Friday-nope. Its a good job i had a good, sensible grandparent leading the front of the line-after doing the road crossing I ended up at the back struggling.

My mission once better. Me and that hill are going to be friends. I will be practising getting up that hill with pace and speed. Clearly the locals are used to it. The trip to the church included a child telling me i was brave walking to the church without mybhood as it was raining and “my hair sometimes goes like yours when its wet”. Charming.

This week also saw my drop in observation from the headteacher which had some kinds comments and some suggestions and made me cry-I was exhausted.

Week 5.

My real, booked in obs, tuesday morning saw me decide to make them work in pairs. I worried about this but I put some of those more likely to struggle with the ta and it worked well. The lesson went well and i got lots of positive feedback. Even with my brain going blank and being unable to spell a word! Couple of pointers but small ones. Wednesday the class were awful, they all fell out with each other constantly. So glad my obs wasn’t wednesday! Thursday we did art and i was so pleased that when they’d tidied it looked like we had not been in the classroom.  Friday was bikeability for hf the class so we did a mix of finishing painting, finishing stories and editing together. It was really nice to work one to one on their stories with them.

Some days i feel like I’m getting somewhere, others not.  But they are beginning to grow on me.

Week 6. An outdoor day and week 7 brings parents evenings and an inset. And half term…..   😃


NQT week 3.

Screenshot_20170924-192104Oh how ill I have felt this week. The cold started Friday evening and got worse over the wekeend. Saturday saw me curled up on the sofa for most of the day planning school work, sneezing, coughing etc. By Monday I felt dreadful and after work was in bed by 9 pm asleep not much later. Tuesday I felt awful, Wednesday not much better and Thursday I was lucky and had a day out of school and it helped greatly to rest.

I have discovered this week that my class can’t spell, grammar isn’t fabulous and they are still a challenging bunch. However, this week-particuarly in maths I feel they have made real progress. Their writing needs to be a focus of mine, neatness, style and content. I hope that I can get them somewhere by the end of the maternity cover.  I felt on Friday that I was getting somewhere, let’s hope this week is further improvement. I was complemented on the fact that children knew already that i liked them-so my interview about being able to build relationships was correct.

Oh but last week I had a child steal something and 2 children draw all over a piece of furniture (I wasnt in that day). This week brings the harvest festival at a local church, parent meetings and general work meetings including head teacher obs- I’m hoping that I’m not in on this cycle as an nqt. Its a bit early with my class.

Week 4-bring it on!

NQT week 2

Pass the beer, the chocolate and the earplugs. Child L thinks I’m lovely- so 1 out of 33 isn’t bad! This week has seen them go swimming for the first time wuth school. So many hadn’t been and they have decided that they love it. Family members were invited to lunch as well this week that got them seriously excited.  Thursday was a challenge. I found the noise level overwhelming and I’m sure so did everyone else!  I feel under scrutiny to get it right, trying to make a good impression and feeling like a failure.  My friend says I’m paranoid at times and chill out. Which is true.

I need ideas on transitions , there’s jyst so many kids in a small toom eith high ceilings, its so hard to use the things I’ve done before. I feel like I need to spend hours on training them rather than teaching them! I’m debating the 1 stand up, 2 do…. etc but I’m just not sure i can see it working.

Looking ahead to week 3. Ppa monday. NQT tues and a course thursday! Sounding better.

NQT week 1

Tuesday saw the start of my NQT year in a brand new school with new systems, different planning and with a very large, boy heavy class. 30+ year 4 children, an eclectic bunch of personalities  (as most classes are).

My class stop was going to be 54321 however, once i realised just how noisy 33 children in a small classroom can be and how fussy they are I have implemented class class instead which is designed for inattentive classes.

Day 1 saw me taking the children out to watch the Tour of Britain, they and i were the most excited by the police bikes who were using their sirens and waving etc. One child resembled tigger he was so excited, bouncing all over the pavement. And at this point i didnt know everyone’s name.

Day 2. Names are almost sorted. Apart from one boy who i keep calling a different name with the same letter. The adhd child has been in trouble over lunchtime period for 2 days. Not listening, doing what he likes. He’s now aware that his choices will be removed if it carries on.

Day 3. How to fill 50 minutes that you have planned for an assembly that doesnt happen!! Handwriitng and looking at photos.  We had cakes bought in on week one. Wonder what week 2 will bring.


The swim on friday evening finished me off. Exhausted. It took the whole of saturday to recover!



Feeling loved.

20170726_211133Tuesday was my final day at my school. In September I am moving on to be an NQT.  I have been at H for 9 years. It has given me many opportunities to develop my career, try new things and finally go on to teaching. It has also provided its fair share of tears. On Monday evening the leadership team I have been part of for 9 years surprised me with some extra gifts. Some quirky pans and storage jars from Aldi  https://www.aldi.co.uk/crofton-pattern-storage-jar/p/077689155263002  I was very surprised. On Tuesday I received my official flowers and a spa voucher and a whole range of presents and cards from the children and parents.

I felt so appreciated by the children. That made my day.

Leaving feels odd. At the moment it just feels like the summer hols. 20170726_145313.jpg the gap is the already started chocolates!

Catching dreams!

Screenshot_20170625-211926.pngJuly is the month of catching dreams. After being rejected in June for a job the following week I was interviewed at a lovely school that i really liked on the look round. I was asked to prepare a PowerPoint about myself which was scary. I put my own quirky take on it and it seemed to go down well. The second part was to take an object for discussion. This time I took a dream catcher. And a poem about letting no one steal your dreams. We discussed their dreams and how to get there and then I gave them a little dreamcatcher kit to take home with them. This appears to have worked as I was offered the job. I was so happy I really liked the school. I have met my new class, the teacher who will be there for a few weeks before leaving for maternity is lovely and I hope it will be a great start.

Then this week I finally had my QTS assessment that looks like it will go through as good. The assessor said that the mistakes had been made by the TES and that my tutor from them needed more training as some of his advice was iffy. He knows his lessons as he was a head and Ofsted inspector but wasn’t as up on the course. He was great for self confidence though.

So this week things appear to have come together. But as often I have a niggle in the back of my head wondering what the next hiccup will be.

I’m looking forward to the summer hols and a new start in september.

In other news I was asked to be a bridesmaid for a friend so I’d best get back in the swimming pool.

Job hunting and teaching.

20170702_141303.pngSo the last post was April. It was all about making myself feel better.

Well after the Easter break my assessment was submitted and I was feeling positive. Roll forward 8 weeks or so and life has been in freefall.

My weight was going up and up without any reason, I’m still waiting for my final assessment from the TES who I have to be honest have been pretty rubbish. My uncle died suddenly and I have attended 3 more interviews to be rejected. This makes a total of 5. One i was poorly on and could hardly speak, 1 was a complete nightmare I spent all weekend on a project to not even be given the opportunity to share it. I Was asked to teach maths.my mentor a mastery maths leader looked at my lesson and said it was good. They said it was too easy-they clearly didn’t understand mastery maths- the idea was to problem solve and logic not the actual maths. The head was a prancy so and so thinking he was God’s gift. I’d seen the teaching in a classroom that morning which was not good. So I guess he doesn’t really have a clue. Hence the inadequate rating!!

Then there was one where one as up against a student that had been at my school. He got it. Im convinced on the fact that they knew him. Then one last week where i had to teach and wait to see whether I was called back the following day. I wasnt. I emailed for feedback and received none. Im not convinced I’d got the year Group I asked for. They were very tall. Plus the head looked me up and down in disgust.so I absolutely broke down on Tuesday evening. I just couldn’t face it anymore. Being looked at.criticised and just plain ignored does nothing for the confidence. My head thinks I’m a good teacher, so does my mentor yet i can’t get a job. Then again they wouldn’t give me a job either.

Anyway. Tomorrow I go again. For a 6th time. This head has met me so won’t be surprised by the way i look, his teacher going on maternity followed a similar route to me-though she mentioned her friend had just finished too so I’m hoping she’s not there tomorrow otherwise I don’t stand a chance. I Think I’m making this my last. I can’t keep being knocked back. Any resilience I did have has gone.

Supply looks like a good option at the moment.

I have loved teaching and i have been more than a student. I have led the class trip, done a class assembly, taken assemblies and parents evening. As well as administered sats and marked and reported on them. I feel like a teacher. Yet no one will give me a chance. I’m despondent.

Dreams and wishful thinking.


My last 2 posts just show how close to the edge i was over my career. I have wanted to teach for years, which is odd because school wasn’t somewhere I ever loved being. I went to see friends and I coasted. My dream was to play sport, model, travel the world or be a hippy with a camper van and live by the sea, all very different. I had no drive to study or do well in exams as i felt they were pointless. I loved history, geogrpahy and parts of English the rest of the lessons were boring. I liked parts of primary school-especially the sporty bits. I still find exams pointless and a waste of time but I like teaching. I like the fact that often each day brings something new or different, I enjoy making the children smile and feel that they belong and that we work together.

So when i got stressed over the tests but managed to ruin my boliday.   But I was determined not to let one piece of senseless, pointless paperwork dictate my future. I put more hours in on study and passed it. The pointless box ticked.

So I am back to following my dream of teaching now-i’m not about to give up. If I can pass the maths then I can do the course easily.

As for modelling-i let the skinny me go a long time ago so that is definitely no longer a dream. The hippy me still exists and I’d still love a camper van and to live by the sea. Maybe one day I will get my house near the sea, teach and own the camper van. I’m not afraid of hard work and its now time to start looking after myself again. In the last few weeks i dont remember when I last drank water-well apart from the glass at lunch today, or ate fruit or even fresh food. It’s time to get back on track and get my course finished, find a job and get ready to start a new career come September.


stressedQTS Skills Test week+ equivalent tests-some Easter hols this is!

My teacher training has been going well, good observations, children making  progress and happy. I have a backlog of assessment pieces to mark at home but thought that I could tackle those over Easter, making a note of which child requires what in their writing for ARE in Sats-useful work.  I was also hoping  to relax and ret and actually feel a bit less overwhelmed and more prepared for my assessment to go through for the summer.

School is in the throws of a restructure, so  before Easter I had to make a decision-more unnecessary stress.

So Easter arrives, I have practised my maths work for the DFE Skills tests and haven’t really worried about the English-my brother calls me the grammar police on a regular basis.  I get to the test centre in Nottingham to have my tests cancelled-so that stressed me out.  I had to stop practise then as I had to revise to take my science equivalent test in exam conditions at school on the Thursday-another afternoon given up to paperwork that doesn’t actually help my teaching.  I had my skills tests booked for the Saturday-which turned out to be the hottest day of the year at 23 degrees, talk about melting.  Anyway, the tests went as expected-I passed the English but failed the maths.  I failed the maths by 1 measly mark-which I have an issue with considering that my computer froze and cost me over a minute in time and could easily have been the extra mark. So now I am revising  again for maths, especially considering that some of  the questions were not anything like the practise papers and the data so tiny it was hard to see.  So I phone learn Direct’s helpline-and their answerphone states they are closed for the bank holiday-a week early!

Below is a quote taken from the DFE website:

Your first attempt at each test is free of charge. If you don’t pass within three attempts, you will need to wait 24 months before you can book any further tests – this would mean starting the teacher training application process again, so make sure you allow plenty of time to revise.

I find this to be complete and unnecessary stress, as a student teacher-I have been graded as good, as above the children’s progress shows I can teach.  This stupid test full of ridiculously long winded questions does not. I understand having to look at grammar, spelling and punctuation, we use those daily (however, this is covered in standard 3 of the teaching standards!)  This type of maths I do not. It is now getting to me to the point where I actually want to pull out-why on earth do we need to sit such ridiculous tests-which are being made harder and the practise material not being updated, either on the DEF website or in all the books sold.

I just want to cry.  I have spent thousands of pounds doing my course, have taken a risk on my career and now I am in danger of being locked out for 24 months-2 years!!!!!!  We have a teacher crisis for goodness sake and yet we are blocking dedicated people from the profession over a silly test.  You are already required to produce GCSE certificates-why on earth these tests haven’t been abolished is beyond me.

My head, senco, deputy head and assistant head took none of these skills test yet are the SLT of a GOOD school-they are not necessary. They are an extra piece of pointless “red tape” designed to allow only the most academic  in to the profession-not all academic ability can be assessed by a ridiculous electronic test, neither can the ability to teach.

The whole of my first week off has been ruined as the beginning of the second.  So when school reopens on Tuesday next week I will not be refreshed, ready to teach, nor will my assessment be done (as I’ll have to do the weekly planning) as I have wasted time studying  for a silly test that is POINTLESS!



QTS skills tests.

If I didn’t think these were completely pointless enough, after all they show nothing about my ability to teach. Maybe the spelling and grammar could be assessed through observations etc as they are useful but as for the rest its another beurocratic waste of time tonput potential teachers off. I am yet to decide what these prove.

So today I am mentally prepared for the maths and the English. I get there early. I sit down I read the information.

Others arrive andthen….oh I’m sorry we are going to have to cancel the tests!!! Now one lady had a family emergency and I completely understand her having to go. However, the centre should have proper staffing. It should have staff on supply of who can be called in. So know have to wait 3 weeks to take my tests. 3 weeks which is after the date to decide if I can go forward for assessment and these needed to be done. But learndirect don’t care. Not one bit.

I could travel miles to Leicester or even further to Birmingham. But why should I? It is their fault not mine. I have had my tests booked since February as they didn’t have any evening or weekend ones. I am absolutley disgusted in the treatment. I am justvexpexted thatbi can have time off to do them. Well i cant. I’m teaching and teaching yr2 for sats in 4 weeks time. Cross does not come close. I am livid.